Alliance for Catholic Education
“We wait because there’s a promise. There’s a presupposition of something more worth waiting for.”
“But I want it now!” is a sentence heard throughout the country this time of year. I myself repeated it many times growing up, especially during Christmas. You’ve likely heard, thought, or, if you’re like me, said this before. Last weekend, at ACE’s December Retreat deep in the heart of Austin, Texas, I gathered with 180 teachers to retreat from our busy lives of creating lesson plans, running around a new city, and listening to “6-7” jokes. In my first year of the program, the retreat provided a space to decompress emotions from the first semester of teaching. I spent most of the weekend this year reflecting on the Texas-sized elephant in the room: what my plans are next year.
I’m in a crucial state of discernment as a second-year teacher; I have to decide what I should do in the future. This decision puts me in a funny situation. I’m confident that I’ve been prepared to succeed in whatever I do next, so I’m not anxious. I’m impatient. New career opportunities in my hometown, reconnecting with friends from high school, and most importantly, celebrating the beginning of the next chapter in my life! Don’t get me wrong, my ACE experience has been wholly transformative. I’ve grown so much, which is why I’m excited to put my new skills to the test.
Our retreat focused on Matthew 2:2, “We saw his star at its rising.” I heard many reflections from wise men and women - the perfect Christmas present. They shared wisdom about focusing on the most important questions we should ask during discernment. “Where are the people I want to spend life with?” “What do I treasure and where is it?” “What problems are most important to me, and how do I want to solve them?” These talks inspired my reflection throughout the weekend. I searched for these answers within myself. I gave God thanksgiving for making me a teacher. I expressed gratitude to loved ones and envisioned my future. So what have I learned, what does my future look like? Well, I don’t truly know.
Fortunately, I can tell you the three lessons I learned. First, I need to work somewhere that I’m challenged to grow professionally. I’m deeply satisfied operating in a demanding environment. Teaching is no joke, and I learned that the hard way, but I love it. Second, whatever I do next year, I prefer to be surrounded by loved ones that push me to be the best version of myself. I love my housemates—Angela, Julia, Isabel, JD, and Joseph—and I’ve found that their presence makes me a better friend. Finally, I learned to celebrate the uncomfortable and uncertainty of waiting. Being sent on an unknown journey is a gift. Mary knew nothing of the wondrous plans God had for her when Gabriel announced the birth of our Lord. Peter never knew he’d be the cornerstone of our Church when Jesus called him off his fishing boat. Yet, it was a gift because all they had to do was wait and trust in God. I need to celebrate waiting. We're all waiting for a holiday vacation, cocoa with loved ones, and the birth of our Lord. I. Can't. Wait.